How to survive a broken swamp cooler

So our swamp cooler is broken right now. Everything works, the fan, the pump. But for some reason the pump won't turn on. So how do you survive when your swamp cooler does not work? Here is some practical advice.

First keep the fan running all night long. This will ensure that your house will reach as low as nature will offer on that given night. Next turn the fan off at about 7 to 8 o'clock. This is when the cool weather from outside stops and the temperature begins to go up.
At this point make sure that all the curtains are closed and that the blinds are drawn. This will help to slow the temperature gain in the house. This is not my favorite step because it makes the house dark and in the summertime you want the house lights and happy. But you gotta do what you have to do.
The next step is actually an ongoing step. Drink lots of water! Not my favorite step because I don't really like water but extremely necessary to survive the Heat!
This step is also on going. Dowse yourself with water whenever you just can't handle it. Pull out spray bottles and go outside and spray each other with spray bottles for a while. Before putting the baby down for his morning or afternoon nap get his hair wet and a bit of his shirt.
Escape the house in mid to late afternoon. This helps you escape the worst of it for the longest period of time.
Return to your house to eat dinner at which time begin spraying down the swamp cooler by hand with a hose every 15 minutes. While this does seem tedious it helps to drop the temperature so that your kids hopefully will be able to go to sleep at a decent time... Maybe before 10 o'clock today.
Before the kids go to bed give them a bath. This is not to clean them. This is to get their hair wet and their bodies cool down so that the heat will not get to them as quickly.
After the kids go to bed continue to spray the swamp cooler at least every 20 to 30 minutes until approximately 11 o'clock. Whenever you choose to go to bed yourself, prop all the bedroom doors open so that the cool air which will reach your house at about 3 a.m. will then be able to go into all of the rooms.

And there you have it a practical guide for surviving your broken swamp cooler. :-)